Often in coaching, managers work on changing their behaviors. But there’s another area you need to pay attention to also—other’s perceptions of you. Otherwise you can end up in a situation where people don’t notice you’ve changed—where you’ve become a butterfly, but others still see a caterpillar.

For example, David had gotten feedback that his negativity was a major problem on his team. As he began to dial back on complaining about others, he noticed his teammates often pointed out problems to him privately, almost like they were enticing him to jump back in the fray.

Has this ever happened to you? Did you ever get feedback that you were too critical or didn’t listen enough or were not a team player... you changed your behavior, but it didn’t make any difference?

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